By Sherry Ann Dixon

Let’s be honest, ladies—our dirty secret is out.

We’re topping the list when it comes to adult bullying. Yes, you read that right. I recently attended a professional conference, and in almost every lecture, the words "Adult Bullying" echoed through the room. And what shocked many of us was the statistic that nearly 90% of bullies are promoted, despite their toxic behaviour.

In my 30+ years in the media industry, I’ve seen it firsthand - women bullying women.

You might assume bullies walk around scowling, fists clenched, ready to shout anyone down. But no. The most dangerous kind is the passive-aggressive bully. She’s polished, professional, and often well-liked, especially outside of work. She smiles sweetly at meetings but cuts you down with a curled lip or a condescending glance. With just the twitch of an eyebrow, she can disarm and diminish you in a heartbeat.

We don’t talk about her enough. And even when we do, we excuse her.
“She just needs a man in her life,” we say as if that justifies her daily snide remarks or the subtle takedowns that leave colleagues questioning their worth.

So why do we let it slide?

Because most people don’t know how to respond, they’re frightened. They’re worried they’ll be next. And yes—some are quietly ashamed of their silence. Many choose to leave their positions altogether, not because they can’t do the job, but because they want to escape the bully in the next office.

It’s disheartening but not surprising. With so few senior roles available to women, the competition can become cutthroat. And while men have historically battled for power in the workplace, it seems some women have adopted those same combative tactics—with a twist of mascara and a manicured fist.

But here’s the question we all need to answer:

Are we going to allow adult bullying to escalate, just like schoolyard or domestic bullying—until it's completely out of control? Will we wait until we’re holding placards outside Parliament, demanding new laws to protect us in the workplace?

Or will we have the courage to speak up now?

Let’s be clear: being assertive is not the same as being a bully. Leadership doesn’t require cruelty. Strength doesn’t mean silence when injustice is happening right next to you.

If we’re truly about women supporting women, then we must call this out when we see it, because silence is complicity.

Let’s stop the cycle. Let’s choose better. And let’s lead as we mean it—with empathy, integrity, and respect.